A McFall Real Estate Adventure That Nearly Needed a Recovery Vehicle, a Chiropractor and a Helicopter Rescue
There are days in real estate when you’re negotiating million-dollar deals, inspecting beautiful homes and helping families find their dream property.
And then there are days like this one.
The mission seemed simple enough.
A mature, highly experienced, immensely knowledgeable, slightly less athletic real estate agent, accompanied by his personal assistant and a professional video photographer, would head out to inspect a bush block and capture some stunning marketing footage.
What could possibly go wrong?
Everything.
The adventure began with the three brave explorers squeezing themselves into a four-wheel drive ute.
The Agent occupied the passenger seat where he could expertly point at things and explain how easy the property was to access.
The Personal Assistant sat behind the wheel wondering why every “quick inspection” somehow evolved into an expedition worthy of a National Geographic documentary.
The Video Photographer carried enough camera equipment to film the next season of Survivor.
Off they went.
The first few kilometres were pleasant enough.
Then the road became a track.
Then the track became a rough trail.
Then the trail became a vague suggestion that a vehicle may have passed through sometime during the Howard Government.
The ute bounced.
It rattled.
It groaned.
At one point everyone was airborne simultaneously despite remaining technically inside the vehicle.
The Agent cheerfully exclaimed,
“Just around the next bend, gentlemen.”
This statement was repeated approximately fourteen times over the next hour.
As they ventured deeper into the wilderness, the vegetation became thicker.
Branches slapped against the ute.
Dust filled the air.
The GPS quietly gave up and started displaying messages that seemed to translate to:
“You’re on your own, mates.”
Eventually they reached a section so rough that even the ute paused to reconsider its career choices.
The Personal Assistant looked ahead.
The Video Photographer looked ahead.
Even a nearby kangaroo looked ahead and appeared concerned.
The Agent, however, remained optimistic.
“It’ll be fine.”
These famous last words have historically preceded many disasters.
The ute crawled forward.
Slowly.
Very slowly.
At one stage they removed several fallen branches.
At another stage they debated whether they were still on private property or had accidentally crossed into a different postcode.
The Photographer finally unpacked thousands of dollars worth of equipment.
The drone came out.
Cameras were assembled.
Batteries were checked.
Lenses were cleaned.
Everyone stood ready.
Then the wind picked up.
The trees swayed.
The drone operator frowned.
The bush thickened.
Visibility vanished.
The ideal camera angles disappeared.
After thirty minutes of intense professional discussion, the official assessment was delivered.
“We’ve got absolutely nothing.”
No drone footage.
No video footage.
No hero shots.
Nothing.
The entire expedition had produced exactly zero seconds of usable marketing material.
The team stood in silence.
A kookaburra laughed.
Loudly.
Possibly at them.
The Agent remained positive.
After all, forty years in real estate teaches resilience.
“That’s alright,” he said confidently.
“We’ll come back another day.”
This statement was met with the same enthusiasm normally reserved for tax audits and root canal surgery.
The equipment was repacked.
The three adventurers climbed back into the ute.
The return journey was just as rough, except now everyone knew they had achieved absolutely nothing except testing the ute’s suspension and discovering muscles they didn’t know existed.
Several hours later they arrived back in civilisation, dusty, exhausted and carrying precisely the same amount of footage they had started with.
Zero.
The good news?
The property is still there.
The bad news?
So is the track.
A return expedition is being planned.
Additional supplies may include recovery boards, satellite communication equipment, emergency rations and possibly a wildlife guide.
Real estate isn’t always glamour.
Sometimes it’s not polished shoes and beautiful homes.
Sometimes it’s three blokes in a four-wheel drive ute bouncing through the Australian bush wondering if they’re still heading in the right direction.
And sometimes the most successful part of the entire day is simply making it back to the office.
Stay tuned for Part Two: Agent in the Field Returns… and Hopefully Gets Some Video Footage This Time. 🚙🌿🤣
